Back to Sikh Atar. He finally arrived, and he was all sweaty. Sikh Atar is one of my favorite people of all time. If there were already blogs back in Grade 6 he would have been a resident character, except that there were no blogs then, or internet, or even a computer. After the entire dancing around with the teacher as to why he was late and if he would promise never to do it again etc the class resumed and then thankfully ended. This is the same class where RBTDS and I got in trouble because we laughed incessantly at the teacher when she said “The girl is lapping.” Obviously she meant laughing, because we could think of four reasons why that sentence would be bastos.

“Why were you late?” I asked Sikh Atar.

“Nag-masturbate kasi ako,” he said. Of course he didn’t use the word masturbate, he used the Grade 6 tagalog word for masturbate which we shall not use here because we are mature individuals.

“I see. Sinong pinagmasturbate-an mo?” I asked casually. Pinagmasturbate-an sounds like a weird conjugation, because obviously I didn’t use that conjugation either.

“Si Priscilla Almeda.” he said non-chalantly.

To the uninitiated Priscilla Almeda was an ex-teeny bopper who successfully transitioned to ST films. I don’t recall what ST stands for right now, but it refers to those tagalog movies where people pet and groan and pass off the activity as sex. Sort of like a soft-core penekula. The concept of ST films can be packaged with the concept of pre-tarpaulin movie posters which were hand-painted and posted-up in Cubao or in some theater called Ligaya. My dad has a theory that a town theater was doomed to showing only bold movies because the first movie it ever screened was called “Satan”.

I don’t know why I’m suddenly recalling this taste-less non-event or why I think I should waste five minutes writing about it. Maybe I recently saw some Priscilla Almeda photo somewhere or heard her name somewhere. Which begs the question: Marth V, what movies constitute the filmography of Priscilla Almeda?