While in the elevator which has the strange ability to carry a stretcher with an intubated patient, a huge oxygen tank, six other people, and a heavy trolley I noticed that the trolley was full of bibles, and what should I see when I entered the CENICUlungan callroom but a copy of that free Bible. It was being distributed all over the hospital apparently, and it landed in the callroom just as I was getting into duty, which turned out to be quite sedentary so there was much time to… read it. I realized I haven’t read the Bible for quite some time, so I opened it and decided to read whatever page I would chance upon, and of course, of course, it had to be… Sodom and Gomorrha. Now that I think about it, I’ve been obsessing with this pillar of salt thing, having rammed it down everyone’s throats during our PA night competition that Gracieloopipoop should be turned into a pillar of salt so we could win over FamMed, having admonished Tits that Lot’s wife’s punishment was a little bit exaj, when in fact… I haven’t really read it. That my basis all this time was… Flying House. So I licked my chops and prepared myself for pages and pages of sexual misadventures and misogyny and pure sin that would incur pages and pages of detailed account of its destruction… until I read on and there was just… one short paragraph about the general sinfulness, wherein the male populace both adults and kids demanded that Lot let out the male angels because they want to have sex with them and Lot declined and gracefully offered his daughters instead, which is a confusing anecdote in itself. And there wasn’t much detail either on the salt-turning bit. Matter-of-factly and without so much as a foreshadow it was just stated: At ang asawa nya’y lumingon kaya’t sya’y naging haligi ng asin. Just like that. But what sort of haligi ng asin? One that has facial and body features, or just some sort of tall lump, or is the haligi actually a wall, like a room wall? Is this some sort of abridged version?

Either way Genesis turned out to be an engrossing read, as always. I’ve always feared living in the Genesis era, with the confusing laws on morality and such, and with all sorts of punishment, like being turned into the aforementioned pillar of salt, or getting leprosy all of a sudden, or getting stranded in some mountain never to see the Promised Land, or getting marooned in the desert with no water. But I guess we have the modern equivalents of those punishments anyway. Like two weeks ago, when I turned into a total jerk and hated everything and snubbed everyone and murdered everyone in my head–just one day before the IDS conference my computer announced that my Windows Vista is fake and has therefore stopped working altogether, forcing me to get a genuine… er… yes, a genuine copy of Windows 7, which is quite cool. It has that ability to turn the open windows invisible and stuff. I know what you’re thinking, you wish that the windows are shaped like jetplanes, so you could turn them into… invisible jetplanes! Wonder Woman, right? Right?!?

Categories: Blogs