Residency is done–DONE!!!–in a couple of weeks, unless of course I do something stupid, like get caught having sex behind a post or order something really weird like fleet enema every hour, with acid. In the first few months and in my final days in Diliman I cooked up some sort of list of things I would have to do/experience there before I graduate. Such checklist included: eat as much isaw as I could (check), walk along that white pipe bridge thing (X), avenge myself by snubbing those MMCC people in Sunken Garden (check), watch two warring fratmen do nasty things on each other (X), and other stuff. In med school there was no time for this drama, all I remember was I was either always sleepy or always laughing. My last few days in internship was spent with Ditz the Titz in the MICU, and Ditz the Titz shepherded me towards the end with boatloads of laughter. In our last day after the Sunog RD-Kid, Leif, Jaz, Thymes, and I walked to Roxas till morning and had our pictures taken. I got a death threat for those pictures.
I’ve thought a few months back that come the end I would probably study harder, get more intense in everything, soak things up more, but as I’ve told Djanah this morning while we were, er, sweeping the floor, I only feel more… tamad. That’s not exactly right, what I feel right now is tamaaaaad na taaaaaamaaaaaaad, because the words have to be drawn out. For more. The first thing I do in the morning as I open my eyes is listen if there is heavy rain outside that would cancel work. Then I would drag–DRAG!!!–my feet to the kadiri bathroom and sit on the bangko and pour cold water over me.. for MORE drama. At work I would nestle in my corner and… read comic books. Or watch Twilight Zone with Tits, Djanah, HIV, Marth, or whoever cares to watch. “Twilight Zone na lang ang dahilan kung bakit ako pumapasok,” Djanah expressed.
And since I’m now making a habit of dropping a quote to end my blog entires for more drama effect, let me quote the then unwrinkly Robert Redford from the magnificent Twilight Zone episode Nothing In The Dark. On death he says:
“You see. No shock. No engulfment. No tearing asunder. What you feared would come like an explosion is like a whisper. What you thought was the end is the beginning.”
Teardrop teardrop, but the beginning of what? I’ll tell you the beginning of what! The beginning of MORE suffering! MORE complications just by LIVING! Specialty boards, fellowship exam, fellowship with no money, more exams, more money needed to establish a practice, more years to spend before actually establishing a practice and then… OLD AGE and DEATH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!!!!