Recently my dad has added himself to the group of people asking me to download stuff. Apparently everyone just assumes that I lay in bed all day either staring at the ceiling, whining that it’s so hot, or forming my fantasy super hero group roster in my head. They are absolutely right, so I’m happy to oblige. I’ve been downloading stuff for my father for many years even when he’s never asked for them, but those were things that I also like like like, like old Mission Impossible episodes, Twilight Zone, comic books, and stuff. The first personal request came very recently, and it was strange.

“Please download Ang Tunay Na Ina starring Rosario Moreno,” he said.

What the hellellellel. Sounds either like a pene-kula, or a really old Sampaguita film. I was hoping it was a pene-kula because then there would be more seeders. For the uninitiated a pene-kula is something I’ve already defined years ago, so we’ll just have our trusty Smoketh to define this for us. Take it away, Smoketh.

Smoketh: A pene-kula is an old pinoy film, usually during the bomba era of the 70’s, that actually involves on-screen penetration. Penetration, hence, pene-kula.

So there. Obviously there wasn’t any torrent of Ang Tunay Na Ina, not even Wing Tip would take pains to upload it, so my brother who was initially given this task directed me to You Tube, and there it was. Apparently Ang Tunay Na Ina starring Rosario Moreno is not only sinauna, but it was sinaunang sinaunang sinauna. Like 1938 sinauna, and the You Tube description even claims that it’s one of the five remaining pre-war pinoy movies.

Ang tunay na ina

“Hey dad,” I told dad. “The movie is in You Tube, a site where you could post videos and stuff. It’s accessible all over the world, and the number of views is recorded. Popular videos like Rebecca Black’s Friday has over 140 MILLION views. You know how many views Ang Tunay Na Ina has? SEVEN.”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAH,” he said.

See, AHAHAHAHAHAHA is not just an onomatopeia, it’s an actual sound people make, and it transcends gender, way of life, and age.

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