“Whatchadoin today?” is now fast becoming one of my needy expressions, because truly nothing expresses neediness than anything that insinuates oneself into other’s affairs. This does not totally mean that I’m abandoning my schizoidness, but since I have no passion (passion–a totally pretentious word) to do anything these days the best thing to do is to share this non-passion for things. Truly being alone in non-passion is not fun, and it’s not even dramatic. Usual suspects Smoketh is the prisoner of HD, and I would need to carry a milk-expressing booth for Mrs. T all the time if I’m to drag her anywhere. So to Tits a few days ago: Whatchadoin today?

“I’m attending a STAG party! For a church-mate!!!” Tits proudly declared. But if Tits thought he could fool me into thinking he would allow a naked girl gyrate in front of him and send him directly to hell, he was wrong. Fucking wrong. Mrs. T has accused me of looking for all excuses to using the F word. She is totally right.

“So what will it be, female harloty characters in the Bible gyrating in front of you? The Harlot? Salome? The pig possessed by devils? One of Solomon’s concubines? The dragon? Would a girl come in Revelations Dragon costume?” Sometimes I just expect my batchmates to slap me. Oh, wait, someone did. Not really slapped me, but threw me out the door in genuine rage. Tessieloopagooparoop.

This annoyance at non-passion while being alone has allowed me to let myself get dragged to the movie Eat Pray Love. Now that’s one boring movie. See, I didn’t even bother to beat around the bush, because it’s just boring. In the movie “The Talented Mr. Ripley” Dickie Greenleaf got so annoyed at Tom that he said, “You’re boring!” which of course led Tom to slice Dickie’s face with a sagwan. Must watch The Talented Mr. Ripley again.

While watching Eat Pray Love I became one of those extremely annoying viewers who constantly chat and quip unfunny stuff out of pure boredom. “Bakit sya umiiyak,” I asked Tessieloopagooparoop when at the beginning of the movie Julia Roberts just went down on her knees and prayed and cried for whatever reason. “Kung PGH patient sya na walang pang-ABG hindi nya maiisip ang mga ganyang ka-isyuhan sa buhay,” I insisted. “Nasan na sya ngayon?” I then asked after sleeping through Italy. “Pupunta pa ba syang China, Turkey, Togo, Africa, New Zealand, etc?” “Huuuungh one and a half hours pa!!!”

To the movie’s credit the two women behind me were really into the movie, gushing and laughing and delighting and gushing and giggling and snickering at the smallest provocation. To whoever intends to watch the movie, let me summarize it for you so you won’t watch it: Eat Pray Love Pray Laugh Meander Meander Meander Talk Walk Talk Climb Walk Laugh Eat Spaghetti Meander Meander Meander Get a Haircut Talk Talk Talk Look Pretty Talk Meander Bore Bore Bore. Everything x5. The End.

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