Way back in March 2006 while typing the census in the interns’ callroom Ditz the Titz caught me listening to Kelly Clarkson. I wasn’t particularly a fan, but her songs were in my computer. So she’s catchy, sue me. I knew I wouldn’t hear the end of it, and true enough the whole day Titz would rib me about it. This culminated in her ripping out a pin-up of Kelly Clarkson from one of her showbiz magazines and taping it at the back of my charting clipboard. And I couldn’t tear it out—Titz could dislocate my shoulder with a single pull, remember. So I would be interviewing a patient and he would be staring at Kelly Clarkson at the back of the clipboard the whole time.
Titz is the ultimate source of American idol information. That year was the one where Elliott competed, and she would know his entire repertoire. We were both rooting for Elliott to win and we would both be requesting for an earlier “rest” post during the ICU duties just so we could check that Elliott wouldn’t lose to Bucky Covington, or to our ultimate object of annoyance, that Ace guy. It was while in the Malate church for the baccalaureate mass that Titz texted me in anguish, “Guess who’s in the top two. Somewheeeeeeeere over the raaaaaaaaaainbow!!!!” Eventually we would learn that Elliott pinoy fans are called Yaminoys. This might sound rather corny, until you learn that Mc Phee pinoy fans are called Mc Pheelippines.
Back to Kelly Clarkson. Over coffee Smoketh who has just started watching American Idol last year asked me if Kelly Clarkson were any good. Without thinking or restraining myself I said something to this effect:
“Kelly Clarkson is the 1st winner of the competition. She won over the curly-haired guy Justine Guarini with whom she had an ill-advised movie From Justine to Kelly. Her 2nd album Breakaway which has the songs Breakaway, Since You’ve Been Gone, Because of You, and Behind These Hazel Eyes went on to win her two Grammy Awards over Mariah Carey’s The Emancipation of Mimi. My December, her follow-up album to Breakaway didn’t win her any acclaim because of its darker and rockier edge, but the recently released All I Ever Wanted which contains the hit My Life Would Suck Without You promises to be entirely composed of pop ditties of the Breakaway mold. Any questions?”