Callistus Netromedev in his nostalgia has brought back a very interesting memory I’ve been trying to suppress all these years: open forums! Yes, open forums, because high school kids are the most melodramatic bunch and would cry at the slightest provocation. Now that I’m old with graying temple hair and can no longer get it up (the sympathy at these concerns), not to belittle those high school problems but: you all suck. Those problems suck, they are corny, they are pointless, they wasted much of our time, why do you have to cry at the smallest crap. CRAAAAAAP! This is not strictly true, because even back in high school I would always giggle in my head at the craptacularness of these… problems! Ahahahahaha. During our section’s Feast Day being a manipulative class officer of sorts I was tasked to conduct a game, and this game was… a quiz! Questions went like this:
1. Sino ang umiyak nung open forum last week kung saan ang topic ay “Friendship” dahil sinabihan sya ni Tinya Coli na “Wala kang kaibigan! Wala!!!!”
2. Sino ang umiyak nung Teacher’s Day dahil umaasa syang maging father figure ang teacher na ito ngunit narealize nyang pareho lang sila ng totoong tatay nya na hindi nagpapakita ng emotions?
3. Ilan ang umiyak last Wednesday during the open forum about “Acceptance”? (I can still remember the answer to this: a groundbreaking 28! In a class of 40! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!)
And so on. To their credit my section classmates must have a bizarre sense of humor because they were able to laugh at these things, or they were just afraid of me. My favorite open forum moment, however, would be something about Fecaloid. To illustrate let’s pretend that Fecaloid is her real name. She has a sister with a bad rep in the same school, let’s call her Fecalitha. Fecaloid was always annoyed because everyone would always point out Fecalitha’s misdemeanors to her as if it were her fault, until one open forum Fecaloid couldn’t take it anymore.
Fecaloid: Hindi ako si Fecalitha (massive downpour of tears)! Hindi ako si Fecalitha!!!!!
Sister Goz: (Pats Fecaloid on the head) There, there, FECALITHA, there, there.
In all of our heads (even in the heads of those already crying in sympathy): AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH!!!