Kwashiorkor

The first time we ever had some Kris Kringle of sorts was in Grade 6, and the original plan was to do it weekly. The first theme: something soft. Yes, that was the best we could come up with in grade 6. The plan for the succeeding weeks: something red, something round, something that rhymes with herzegovina, etc. Friday came and we brought out our gifts, and to everyone’s juvenile shock (is there an aged shock?) Borborygmus received a used sanitary napkin. It didn’t smell like blood, in fact it smelled like lipstick. The culprits of course had a good laugh, but not our religion teacher who was livid. She declared that all Kris Kringles were to cease immediately. Someone suggested that instead of gifts maybe we could just exchange letters weekly. Barf, I know, but the nun agreed, satisfied. Until I suggested that for the first week, the theme would be insulting letters. The nun was enraged and almost popped an aneurysm, so no further sanitary napkins or insulting letters got exchanged.
A year before that Borborygmus was believed to have tried to kill himself. He allegedly took in a bunch of diazepams, because he was found slumped unconscious on the ground. Apparently, he was in love with this girl G, who was in love with this boy B. It would have been a simple case of jealousy, except for the fact that Borborygmus was also in love with boy B, who was not in love with anyone. This was all too confusing, hence the diazepams. Of course he got well and all (our HELE teacher force fed him spoons and spoons of sugar), and during recess the next day he elaborated that in his unconscious state he saw Saint Peter who told him that, of course, it was not yet his time. “Does he really have a rooster?” Kwashiorkor asked. “It was a beautiful scene, with St. Peter showing me the error of my ways,” Borborygmus beamed. “Is the rooster fat?” Kwashiorkor asked. And so on. I have no idea where Kwashiorkor, Borborygmus, G, or B are right now, or if they even remember any of this. I hope they don’t.



Categories: Blogs

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Rich Cervales Blog

Life snippets documented 😃

JessicarulestheUniverse

Personal blog of Jessica Zafra, author of The Collected Stories and the Twisted series

The Gastronomy Gal

Simplicity in food and travel

Sachified

Beneath the nurse’s apron and soon-to-be doctor’s coat.

KatFredTing.com

Snippets of our journey in life, love, and everything in between.

Coffee Cups and Waving Wands

I talk about a lot of things.

Brilliant Viewpoint

Discover • Motivate • Inspire

Jonas Diego

Write. Shoot. Sleep. Repeat.

...STILL CRAZY AFTER ALL THESE YEARS!

Rantings, ravings & ramblings of a rollicking mind

Pinay Mama in Singapore

working mom. wife. student. ofw.

Starloggers

Observations, Reports & Remarks From Out Of This World & Beyond

Too Dangerous For a Girl 2

Comics reviews, chat and commentary

BiblioNyan

A space for all things pertaining to Asian literature & cinema, otaku culture, and self-care.

My Half-Baked Notes

A personal blog of a bewildered teacher

HappymessHappiness

Full-time daydreamer, half-time paranoid.

Aggie's Amygdala

love, laugh and lore from the limbic system

dailyknockoff.wordpress.com/

A great Metropolitan Internet thing

%d bloggers like this: